[Leipzig AU] a means to a necessary end

[nerves_of_ice]

It's a long flight from Berlin to Novosibirsk and the secret location far beyond it, even in a Quinjet. They spend the time planning and coordinating. Bucky describes the structure and security of the facility itself as best he remembers. Tony calls up plans and blueprints from god knows where and throws them into the middle of the plane for all to see. They're not the same as what Bucky remembers, they figure out fairly quickly, but they're better than nothing.

Tony also takes over the back of the plane and snaps at anyone who comes close, doing something that involves shifting screens and models of buildings and wave patterns and a human skull, and the eventually the low humming grind of a machine. Soon after, he stalks back up to the front of the plane and shoves a set of custom-fabricated earplugs at Bucky, who stares at them and then at Tony.

"Noise-cancelling all the way to total sound blackout. Tap the end of the earpiece to deafen yourself," Tony informs him. "Last thing we need's for you to be his puppet." Bucky starts to stammer a thanks, but Tony growls something under his breath and stalks back to the back of the plane again to work on something else. Steve catches Bucky's eye and shakes his head, and Bucky decides to leave well enough alone.

Sam advises everyone to rest in shifts; Bucky knows he's not wrong, but neither he nor Steve can do it, and after a while Sam stops trying to convince them. Natasha sits with him for a while, her eyes dark with concern. They don't say much, but there's no need to.

A Snowcat is parked outside the door of the facility when they land. Bucky's jaw sets in hard lines at the sight of it, and he trades a look with Steve.

They're already here.

Comments

[from_the_outside]

"Oh, Nat," she whispers, holding her friend's hand tight. She can all too easily imagine the horror of that moment, the despair and fear and desperation, and her heart breaks for them both.

Compromised. She thinks about Bucky's tight voice on the phone, asking about her suspension, asking over and over again if she's okay, how tightly he held her that night.

"No wonder he was so worried about what Ross would do," she murmurs, as a few more pieces fall into place.

[marvel_npc]

She nods, squeezing Sharon’s hand back. “Yes. And the business with Zemo certainly hasn’t helped either, you can be sure.”

[from_the_outside]

She nods back and falls silent for a long moment, as warring emotions tangle in her chest.

"I know it was a long time ago," she says, finally. "But I'm sorry if... him and me... I'm sorry if I hurt you."

She doesn't regret a damn second of it, but she'd never wanted to hurt her friend.

[marvel_npc]

She gives their joined hands a little shake. “Don’t. The only thing that would upset me is if you pulled away from something that makes you both happy because you were worried about me,” Nat tells her.

“He’ll always be important to me, but it’s not the same now. I’m not the same. Neither is he.”

[from_the_outside]

Sharon smiles, small and warm.

"Don't worry," she teases. "I'm not that good a friend."

[marvel_npc]

She laughs. "Good. Glad to hear it," she teases back.

[from_the_outside]

Sharon gives her hand a last squeeze before letting go as she takes another sip of her martini.

"Thank you for tell me," she says. "And for coming back here with me."

[marvel_npc]

"You're welcome. For both," she assures her, firmly. "Now. What do you need, to evict the memories of that bastard from your space, so you can be comfortable here again?"

[from_the_outside]

Sharon huffs a laugh and lifts her glass. "More of this," she says.

"And maybe doing something normal, like having dinner with a friend. What do you think?"

[marvel_npc]

"I think that sounds just about perfect," Nat tells her, smiling. "Finish that while I mix up a new round for us, and then we can call in a dinner order somewhere."

[from_the_outside]

"Sounds perfect."

She toes off her shoes and gets up from the couch to turn on some music as she sips at her martini, then takes a moment to text both Steve and Bucky's burner phone, unsure which method might get to Bucky sooner.

To Steve, she sends: Will you help me go see him?

To the burner, she sends: Stay safe. I miss you. I'll see you tonight. Promise.

The rest of the evening, spent in Nat's warm company, is, she thinks, a balm to them both. It doesn't quite erase the memories of Zemo and their fight, but it goes a long way to starting.

[nerves_of_ice]

Steve's with him in the guest apartment when the message comes in. "Sharon wants to see you," he says, looking down at his phone and already starting to type a response. "I'm assuming you're okay with that?" He looks up to give Bucky a mischievous smile, then laughs at the expression on Bucky's face. "Yeah, yeah, I know. I'll meet her at the cross street when she gets here and walk her in."

"Thanks," he murmurs. "I'm sorry to be--" The apology dies in his throat at Steve's stern look.

"Don't say it. You're not being any trouble, and you're not causing any, either. We'll get through this. All of it."

Bucky just nods, too full of complicated feelings to even be able to express any of it. But it's Steve, and because of that he doesn't need to.

Steve brings him up to speed on what Tony had relayed from his meeting with Ross, and on the discussion afterwards. T'Challa stops by briefly to ensure he's settled in, then excuses himself to go deal with other matters. The Dora Milaje outside are unobtrusive and absolutely competent - he can tell from the way they carry themselves, even if he doesn't know anything about them.

The evening remains quiet. He spends the time with Steve and does his best not to listen to his own thoughts otherwise.

[from_the_outside]

Once Nat leaves, Sharon spends a little time wandering around her apartment, letting herself remember without shying away from the feelings that result, carefully checking in with herself.

She can stay here, she knows. It's not unsafe; even more so now, with the security updates she'll make to it. If she doesn't come back to it tonight, it won't be because she's afraid to be in it alone.

Afterwards, she takes her tote and heads out to the address Steve sent her, anticipation thrumming through her blood.

Whatever else is happening, she's going to hold onto this with both hands, she promises herself. No matter what.

[marvel_npc]

He goes out to collect Sharon as arranged, leaving Bucky behind in the apartment. He'd remembered to alert the security detail that she'd be visiting, and makes sure to arrive early at the location, not wanting her to have to wait. He figures he'll stick around for a little while after, then make his farewells and head back to the hotel to rejoin the others.

It's hard, because he wants to spend every possible second with Bucky. The fear of losing him again rises up and threatens to choke him at odd moments. Steve pushes it back down, recognizing it for what it is, and breathes through it with one of the techniques that Sam had taught them all for centering and balancing in response to stress.

There's sure been enough of that lately, for all of them. Steve puts his hands in his pockets and glances around, looking for any sign of Sharon.

[from_the_outside]

He's an easy figure to spot, tall and striking on the street corner, and Sharon smiles a little to herself to see him.

"Hey there, Cap," she greets, as she walks up. "Doing okay?"

[marvel_npc]

"Still hanging in there," he says, with a warm smile for her. "Hi, Sharon. How are you?"

[from_the_outside]

"About the same," she says, coming to a halt, her fingers wrapped around the handle of her tote at her shoulder. "What a week, huh?"

[marvel_npc]

"It sure has been," Steve agrees. "Come on, it's this way."

As he turns to lead her toward the building halfway down the block, he tells her, "They've been good to him. He didn't come with me to get you because - well, they've assigned him a security detail and are pretty insistent that he not leave the premises without their escort, for his protection, but they also made it clear it's because of taking T'Challa's promise seriously, not for any other reason."

[from_the_outside]

"Good," she says, and gives him a sidelong glance.

"The Secretary hasn't caused any trouble yet, has he?"

[marvel_npc]

"Not yet." He sounds as grim as he feels. "Tony bought us a little time, and Ross had something else to do in the afternoon so he hasn't followed up yet, but I can't imagine that's going to last long."

The guard at the door nods to Steve and gives Sharon a sharp-eyed, searching look before waving her on through in Steve's company. "You are a welcome guest, but do not attempt to go anywhere unescorted, Agent Carter," she says. "These premises are considered part of Wakanda by order of our king."

[from_the_outside]

They don't do anything by halves, do they?

Sharon nods. "I understand," she says. "I'll abide by your rules. Thank you for allowing me to visit."

[marvel_npc]

The guard gives her a second searching stare, followed by a regal nod. "You may proceed," she tells them. Steve nods his thanks back and leads Sharon to the stairs.

"Second floor," he murmurs. "You won't be able to miss it."

The presence of the Dora Milaje outside the apartment door's a clear enough giveaway, after all.

[from_the_outside]

"Thanks, Steve."

She pauses just for moment, looking at him. "You know, even though everything is so complicated, I'm glad you two are finally back together," she says, after a few seconds of silence.

"I really am sorry for lying to you before. I hope you know I always wanted to see the day you'd be reunited."

[marvel_npc]

"I know. Bucky told me you were trying to convince him to get in touch with me," Steve tells her. "I'm sorry I got so harsh with you. I took what I was feeling out on you, and I shouldn't have."

[from_the_outside]

"It's okay," she says, smiling slightly before turning to take the stairs. "I understood. Are you coming up?"