[Leipzig AU] a means to a necessary end

[nerves_of_ice]

It's a long flight from Berlin to Novosibirsk and the secret location far beyond it, even in a Quinjet. They spend the time planning and coordinating. Bucky describes the structure and security of the facility itself as best he remembers. Tony calls up plans and blueprints from god knows where and throws them into the middle of the plane for all to see. They're not the same as what Bucky remembers, they figure out fairly quickly, but they're better than nothing.

Tony also takes over the back of the plane and snaps at anyone who comes close, doing something that involves shifting screens and models of buildings and wave patterns and a human skull, and the eventually the low humming grind of a machine. Soon after, he stalks back up to the front of the plane and shoves a set of custom-fabricated earplugs at Bucky, who stares at them and then at Tony.

"Noise-cancelling all the way to total sound blackout. Tap the end of the earpiece to deafen yourself," Tony informs him. "Last thing we need's for you to be his puppet." Bucky starts to stammer a thanks, but Tony growls something under his breath and stalks back to the back of the plane again to work on something else. Steve catches Bucky's eye and shakes his head, and Bucky decides to leave well enough alone.

Sam advises everyone to rest in shifts; Bucky knows he's not wrong, but neither he nor Steve can do it, and after a while Sam stops trying to convince them. Natasha sits with him for a while, her eyes dark with concern. They don't say much, but there's no need to.

A Snowcat is parked outside the door of the facility when they land. Bucky's jaw sets in hard lines at the sight of it, and he trades a look with Steve.

They're already here.

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[from_the_outside]

She curls into him, her arms around his neck, shifting on his lap so she can press herself to his chest, her cheek against his hair.

"I'm here," she whispers. "I'm here with you. It's okay, Bucky."

[nerves_of_ice]

It's selfish of him, he knows it, but just for a few minutes he lets himself be selfish. He holds on to her, breathing in her warmth, feeling her weight against him and her shape in his arms, and reminds himself that she's alive, she's safe, she's okay.

And will be okay, too, even without him. Maybe even better without him, once he's gone. She has friends, family, people who care about her - including Natasha - she'll be okay, even if he's never able to leave Wakanda again.

Slowly his breathing steadies.

[from_the_outside]

She presses soft kisses to his hair, runs her hand gently over his head and shoulders, lets him hold onto her as long and as tightly as he needs.

After an eternity of moments, his breathing slows and steadies. She makes soft, soothing sounds and rests her cheek against his hair, letting her eyes close as she does her best to imprint this feeling on her memory.

[nerves_of_ice]

"So," he murmurs, eventually, without moving.

"How was the rest of your day?"

[from_the_outside]

Her laugh is more a lift of her chest and a puff of breath into his hair than a sound.

"Busy. Suspended or not, Ross had plenty for me to do. And then Nat came back with me to the apartment. Helped me exorcise it, a little."

[nerves_of_ice]

"So you didn't have to go back there alone," he realizes. "Good."

[from_the_outside]

"She's a good friend," Sharon murmurs, and holds him a little tighter.

[nerves_of_ice]

"She is," he agrees, and looks up at her as her arms tighten around him.

[from_the_outside]

She shakes her head slightly and loosens her arms to look down at him.

"A little better?"

[nerves_of_ice]

He nods.

"How long can you stay?"

[from_the_outside]

"Until the Wakandans kick me out," she promises.

"Do you think they'd let me stay the night?"

[nerves_of_ice]

"I don't see why not." He searches her face. "But then they'll know."

[from_the_outside]

"Is that a bad thing?"

She asks it gently, all too aware now of the delicacy needed. He's already worried about what will happen to her because Ross knows about them; if he's worried about the Wakandans, too, she'll have to do her best to lay those fears to rest.

[nerves_of_ice]

"I don't know?"

Halting and uncertain. He's searching her face for any sign of hesitation, any hint of what she's thinking or feeling.

"Would you mind?"

[from_the_outside]

"No," she says, and ghosts her thumb over his cheekbone. "I don't care who knows anymore. I don't want it to be a secret."

[nerves_of_ice]

He tilts his head into her touch, and his breath shivers in and out as she draws her thumb over the arch of his cheek.

"Then stay," he whispers. "Stay with me tonight."

[from_the_outside]

She smiles at him, as sweet and warm as a June morning. "Okay," she whispers, and curves her hand to his cheek as she leans down to kiss him.

"I'll stay."

[nerves_of_ice]

He makes a low sound deep in his chest and kisses her back. Bucky runs his right hand up into her hair, threading his fingers through it and cradling her head.

[from_the_outside]

She shivers at that sound and kisses him more deeply, intent and searching. She'd been so tired last night, sore and aching, and she still is all of those things, but she doesn't care. All she wants is more of him, as much as she can get.

[nerves_of_ice]

He keeps a ruthlessly tight rein on himself, cherishing her with repeated slow kisses, tilting her head slightly to better fit his mouth to hers, running his left hand up and down her back in long, lazy strokes as he keeps her cradled against him in the curve of his arm.

[from_the_outside]

She kisses him back, over and over; slow, drowning kisses. Her fingers run through his hair and then tangle in it as she makes soft sounds against his mouth, shivering in his arms.

Whatever happens, even if he has to go all the way to Wakanda and stay for who knows how long, she's never letting this go. She'll find a way to come to him. She'll have to.

[nerves_of_ice]

She grips his hair and the sudden bolt of need that flashes through him would bring him to his knees if he were standing, he's sure of it. As it is, he can't keep back the moan that escapes him, can't stop himself from kissing her more deeply in response.

[from_the_outside]

That moan sizzles straight to her gut and her fingers grip harder in response.

She hadn't had to do much with the cover Zemo had given her, but what little there was still feels like a film of grime all over her – but with each kiss, each caress, he's tenderly washing it all away, just like he'd washed her skin in the shower the night before.

She kisses him again, then ghosts her lips over his jaw. "Lie down with me," she murmurs, her hand sliding from his hair down his neck to his chest and back up again.

[nerves_of_ice]

"Sharon," he whispers, and kisses her again. "Sharon. Baby. Shouldn't you be resting instead?"

Even as he asks, his hand roams gently over her back, down to the swell of her hip, and up again.

[from_the_outside]

"It'll help me rest," she murmurs, as reasonably as she can when his hands on her body are driving her crazy.

She kisses him again, and again after that. "Don't you have any idea what you do to me?" she whispers between kisses. "Bucky, you bring me to life."